In Memory Of You

December 4, 2010 at 1:19 AM 6 comments


skyscape

Originally uploaded by HR Photography Girl

 

 

Sometimes I’m okay and I get through the day,
At other times I feel barely alive and wonder what you would say,
If you saw me like this, if you knew how I hurt,
How much I miss you but I can’t put into any form of words.
Not really.
Not honestly.
It’s still so raw.
It’s been over a year. A little over two, actually.
You died on a Wednesday.
It was just before Thanksgiving.

I found out on a Friday.
I didn’t say a single word until Saturday.

Sometimes the holidays are hard.
I’m not over your death.
And this year I have new problems.
You would know just what to say.

You would give me glitter glue.
Kiddie Scissors.
Paper.
Googley eyes.

In the quiet moments for me to sit and dwell,
I feel myself crawling into my shell,
You were always there for me in your own sort,
The place that you worked was my secret fort.
In a very public way.

You are one of my biggest inspirations for life,
I know that you don’t want me to feel strife,
But some days I miss you too much too long,
I get lost in the memories, like a country song.

You died too young.

You will always be my children’s librarian.

You are missed.

I never realized how important you were.
I never got to tell you in person what you meant to me.

I hope my actions spoke it loud and clear.

These tears I am crying might be of loss,
But I know what you’d say to that, Boss.
Craft time with you used to be my favorite.
I hold onto the memory, I savor it.

I hope you get to live in a beautiful sky like the one in my photograph.

Happy Adventures (wherever you are),
Burkie

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In the crazy mess of life, love is subtle. Until it’s gone. Then it becomes everything. November Christmas (A Review)

6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Kathryn  |  December 4, 2010 at 4:43 AM

    Did you write this? It’s really beautiful!

    Kat Xx

    Reply
    • 2. Heather  |  December 4, 2010 at 9:17 AM

      Yes. I did write this. I also took the photograph. ;’/ And thank you. I just wrote it to express some of my feelings about a loss I am still struggling to get over.

      Reply
      • 3. Kathryn  |  December 4, 2010 at 7:08 PM

        yeah, losing someone. Had my first experience of that yesterday when my grandfather passed away.
        Not the best day of my life, I’m not going to lie.
        I don’t know why I just told you that but there we are!
        Strange how it’s easier to write it to someone I don’t know, than people I do know!
        Hope you’re ok,
        Kat Xx

      • 4. Heather  |  December 4, 2010 at 9:33 PM

        I think it is easier to be vulnerable with strangers than with people you know because you don’t have that fear of rejection if you don’t even know them to be rejected anyway. Maybe. I still have a lot to figure out. And I am terribly sorry about your Grandfather. 😦

  • 5. bornnomad  |  December 7, 2010 at 11:43 PM

    I wanted to drop you a note to tell you how much I have enjoyed reading your blogs. Not sleeping well I have been just going form one blog to the otherwith the tag homeschool. Your site is the only one I have actually stopped at tonight and read blog after blog on your site. I love your photographs. They are so creative and beautiful! Even though I am 31 and a mother of 3 that I homeschool, I completely get your comments and share so many of the same interest as well. My whole bedroom and bathroom are painted purple! I love it! I think you are a very neat young lady and I look forward to reading more blogs in the future!~Wendy

    Reply
    • 6. Heather  |  December 8, 2010 at 12:43 PM

      Thank you very much! 😀 I understand not always being able to sleep well and bouncing from blog to blog. Have you ever been to http://www.thepioneerwoman.com before? Ree is a very cool lady, who homeschools her 4 children. She has a wonderful photography section, and her “confessions” are downright hilarious sometimes. I think she has a special education/homeschool page/tab too. Not sure though… now I feel like I need to go check again. 😛

      I am jealous that your bedroom and bathroom are purple. My bedroom is plain. I just recently got a purple, blue, and green comforter! Ha ha.

      Reply

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Reading: just about anything I can get my hands on, other blogs, and especially YA Fiction Novels. Lately I have been really into anything by SARK and other non-fiction books. __________________________________ Writing: updates for my blog, a children's book, music/lyrics, and letters to pen pals. ;) __________________________________ Singing: Warm-Ups. __________________________________ Learning: How to use my voice as an instrument, History of Art, Watercolor, how to be actively involved in creating a better community, and something new every single day. __________________________________ Hoping for: Wisdom and patience when things are hard, a smile no matter what, and a better community. __________________________________ Dreaming about: HAPPINESS __________________________________ Eating: <3 Peanut Butter Pie. Peanut Butter Sandwiches. Peanut Butter No-Bake Cookies. __________________________________ Drinking: Water, usually. __________________________________ Playing: The Sims 3, Dance Central, and the Piano and Guitar. __________________________________ Watching: Christmas/Halloween movies, Who's the Boss? reruns, and crazy-cool documentaries about dead people. __________________________________ Listening to: Informative & Educational Podcasts, all kinds of music, and trying to listen to my parents (they are very wise, after all).

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